This is an urgent appeal to all human kind. Can you find it within yourself to donate just £2 pounds a month? To long we have stood on the sidelines, while a certain avian friend has reached suicidal levels of depression. A am of course talking about the pheasant.
This is the story about Phil.
On one manically depressive day Phil told Philise that he was going down the pub to drown his sorry in the bottom of a glass. Little did Philise know that this would be the last time she saw him alive. ( Nothing to do with the fact she proceeded to drown herself to cope with her depression.)
After several glasses of the finest glass of grass brewed ale that seed can buy Phil knew what need to be done. Rallying the rest of his comrades who all to were suffering from huge level of depression. The seed crunch was effecting everyone one. They all walked alone the road and waited for what the ancestors called the lights.
After what seemed like hours, when does with weak wills started to give up hope it finally happened. Two lights appeared in the distance Phil of course new what to do. The suicidal technique had been passed down from Pheasant to Pheasant for generations. As the approaching lights grew brighter they readied themselves. The rookie kamikaze pilots dived in front of the car but where dodged effortlessly.
Phil waited, looking from side-to-side the car was feet away. At this moment he stepped out...........R.I.P Phil.
Now please can you find it in your heart to donate. Your £2 pound a month will help buy anti depressants for these birds, and copious amounts of exstacy for the worst effected. If this fails your money will help to humainly dispatch of this race before they go the same way as the dodo.
So please can you help keep this bird in fields and wooded areas and out of the grills of motor vehicles.
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